I’ve grown up quite a bit over the last year, which I know must sound odd figuring that I’m 44 years old and already a grown-up. Please allow me to explain in greater detail.
I am on a path of self-realization. I’m seeing my past mistakes and faults through a strong microscope, calling myself out on my own bullshit.
I ask the Universe and God, my angels and my father for guidance on a regular basis.
I’m taking notice of the little signs that are being sent to me, through music, similarities, angel numbers, coincidences and my daily interactions with others.
I’m starting to speak my truth and to follow my natural intuition. I no longer shrink myself down to make others feel comfortable. I’m seeking self- forgiveness, for being so unfair and cruel to myself practically my entire life. I’ve always had such a hard time loving myself for who I am and although it’s a work in progress, I feel as though I’m partway there.
I reject anyone who goes out of their way to hurt me.
I feel more sorry for asshat than I do hate him, because he’s an empty, morally defunct husk of a man who will never know love. I’m doubtful that he’ll ever find any sort of peace within himself, no matter how many woman he sleeps with or if he ends up owning a bunch of the selfish possessions that he was always so hungry for.
All I want is to become the person that I was meant to be.
A good person who doesn’t take advantage of people, somebody who tries each and every day to be better than I was the day before.
My old self, well, she’s starting to vanish and is being replaced by the woman that I am starting to watch emerge (amazingly) from the depths of a hell that was of her own creation.
I will continue to struggle and stumble, because life is a wicked bitch sometimes, but my friends, it is also breathtakingly beautiful.
The shedding of my old skin is now just the archaic remains of my far too long-buried soul.